Unplanned things that
happened
Not all things go as planned.
But still, we can say that even in those moments a person can find
happiness. Some of the things from Part One can also be included in this section.
1) We saw fireworks!
2) We saw a hedgehog!
3) We were around the English
language school when the alarm brought the security and the police (of course,
we are not responsible for switching the alarm)
4) We spoke to a person who can’t
speak – not a good experience I must say, but it was a bit strange
5)
All the above things happened in
one night
6) W e did not see any falling
stars, but we actually prepared ourselves; magical moment on the balcony in a
cloudy but warm night (see number 8 from Part One)
7)
We went to the theatre – our first
meeting after more than a year apart from each other. We went to see this year’s
play, presented by the Student Theatre. Sadly or not, this year I was among the
people watching the performance. A strange feeling it is to be just a spectator.
8) drinking Korean –made juice with aloe.
Two weddings and two funerals
As I mentioned before, I went to my friends’ wedding in June (I was
a bridesmaid, too!)
The pictures of the first wedding finally arrived and they are truly
hilarious. Not because of the faces I made in some of the photos, but also the
whole atmosphere is very positive and filled with happy vibes. The newlyweds
are a wonderful couple and, I must add, that they deserve this happiness, after
all the struggle they have been to (it’s very personal and it more information
won’t be given). I wish them long years love, health and happiness.
The second wedding was at the end of July. I wore a custom made
dress by my mother. It feels good to write it like that – “custom-made” – just
like “made by a famous designer”, but it was made by my mom and I think that is
even better.
A very fun and light experience amidst the very warm weather, this
wedding had its own charm and another good asset – more young people than the old
guests. I was there with the couple from wedding number one and it was such a
relief (a lot of unfamiliar people = nervousness).
I am glad that I was invited to both weddings and to have such
amazing friends that respect me – something that I think I miss in our society
or at least in my life recently. To be invisible most of the time may be comforting
but it can be painful for you self-confidence in moments when you want to be
heard or seen.
About the funerals… I actually wasn’t present at any one of them. It
may sound very rude to include them here, but the people mentioned had more or
less a significant part in my life or how it goes at all.
At the beginning of August our young colleague to whom I actually
have been substitute to, died from skin cancer. She was 25 years old, young and
had her life in front of her. Oli and I know her from before; we
even went to a tour to Germany together with the choir. When she became a lot
worse in her illness I had to take her place for a while. I remember the week
before her death I was hoping that she would come back soon and I imagined how
I would explain to her all the new things at work... May her soul find peace.
The second person, even closer to me that is not among us anymore,
is our class teacher. She taught us Bulgarian Language and Literature and was with us
for four precious years, trying to hear each story in one way or another,
trying to make us feel valuable and loved. I am not sure that I have all the
appropriate words nor the strength to describe her in the most genuine way and also, to say how
deeply this affected me. Our class doesn’t have a parent anymore. In two years,
if we gather altogether, there won’t be that important person I would like to
share all my excitement, bitterness and grown-up thoughts about life. She is
just… gone.
Apart from these two cases, that had a great impact, a lot of my
surroundings experienced losses of their close people not only in August, but
in 2016 at all. I really feel that this year is not my or our year at all, but
I stand here, trying to pass all through the hardships, saying that it could be
even worse. I am thankful that at least I have my close people healthy and happy
around me (or at least trying not to lose contact with me). And I am grateful
to see that there are people who actually care about me. Not on Facebook,
Twitter, Instagram or any other social media platform, but in my life.
Exciting things ahead
Angers, here she comes!
Oli was accepted to study E-tourism in Angers. New city, new people,
all alone in the rented flat – very challenging perspective, yet very exciting!
Of course, she would be even more busy (she already is), but this won’t stop me
from supporting her, although I truly miss her and the feeling varies from deep
sadness to strong frustration sometimes. Anyway, good luck to you, my dearest
friend! Fighting!
Ideas and positive thoughts
Recently I have written a lot of things that come to my mind. I have
been doing this for years, but not every time in a structured way. It has been
almost two years since I started my current job and started actively writing
almost everything that I feel and I have gathered a lot of thoughts, experience
and ideas to share. Although they do not have much to do with the work I have,
I must say that it is time for me to step ahead and start doing (some) of them.
I have this feeling which was lost for a while, that good things will happen.
And I think it is time to embrace the positive thoughts and put my introverted,
melancholic and depressed side in the wardrobe of my fears for a while. We will
see. :)
I think this describes in brief what I wanted to write after Oli left for France in mid-August. Of course, if I was more persistent with the blog, these words would have come in a more creative and certainly not so boring way, perhaps each week during the summer. But, anyway, I am glad that I resumed most (but not all, of course) of the things I wanted to share. I will not write about the future plans for this blog, because big intentions don't always count as big actions.
Okay, that was it. For now.
Bye.
R.
